The First Time I Received Hate Mail

Yeah, there's been more than one time.

Some form of this post will eventually be included in Living with People I Want to Punch in the Throat. It is unedited and in rough draft form.

---

Hate mail is nothing new if you have any sort of presence on the internet where you share your opinions. People just like to tell you that you suck. They also like to argue about really stupid shit.

Of course, there are times that I’ll write something and I’ll think, “Well, here we go. Get the popcorn, this one’s going to be good!” I purposely did that. Either to shake the tree and get rid of the dicks or just because I like to watch the world burn. Either way, it’s satisfying and the hate mail is expected. I brace myself for it. I plan for it. I have pithy responses planned and the ban stick at the ready.

But it’s the times when I’m not even sure what I did that surprise me. Who knew people had very strong opinions about how to fold a fitted sheet? Or, the worst is when I write about someone who normal people would think is an absolute asshole (Donald Trump) and people come out of the woodwork to defend them.

Over the years I’ve gotten used to the hate mail. I get a lot of DMs, many emails, and even some snail mail.

But the first time I ever received hate mail, the internet barely existed and I didn’t have anywhere to share my strong opinions, except in person. So imagine my surprise when I checked my mailbox one day and found a handwritten note calling me