When "The" D.A. Asked to Speak to the Manager of the Police

A routine traffic stop

Photo by Scott Rodgerson on Unsplash

Do you know what gives me life? Assholes being themselves. I’ve been able to build a cottage industry on talking about these dumb fuckers. Every now and again I think I might run out of content but then some asshole raises their hand and says, “I volunteer as tribute!”

This week’s tribute is Sandra Doorley—also known as “THE D.A.” of Monroe County, NY. Don’t even pretend like you don’t know her because EVERYBODY knows her. Just ask her, she’ll tell you!

So, Sandra was driving her giant ass SUV through town when a cop clocked her doing 55 in a 35 zone. He hit the lights and the sirens and took off after her. Sandra looked in her rearview mirror and was like, “Does he know who I am?” She didn’t even touch the brakes, instead picked up her phone and called her pal, “Dennis.”